Juin Charnell

Juin Charnell -

I did finish but I need a cover

I finished the challenge. So I’m posting one of the stories here. Let me know what you think.

Eclipse

 

Sticky tar on the bottom of their tiny tennis shoes slowed Laurie’s four little ones as they made their way to the center of the roof. As she spread the threadbare blanket, snatched from her double bed for use as a makeshift picnic blanket, she hoped it was enough to keep the heat off. Her four lemmings following their leader. Five, four, three, two.

She positioned each in front of a bowl.

She’d come up moments before and left the meal on the heat vent. She was dragging not just from the hundred degree temperature but the day to day, paycheck to paycheck existence which was her life. She didn’t know if she could continue.

“It’s too hot for oatmeal,” whined the four year old.

“It’s a special oatmeal,” said Laurie. “It has fairy dust to help us fly.”

“I want a Popsicle,” asked her five year old.

“After the eclipse,” she said.

All four children rushed to take a seat in front of a bowl.

“There’s no such thing as fairy dust,” said the five year old, giving her mother an expectant look.

“Fairy dust is real,” said Laurie, her hands on her hips, “If you know where to get it.”

The two year old got up from her spot on the blanket and wandered over to the edge.

Her mother panicked and ran over to the small child and knelt in front of her. She hugged her to her chest tightly.

“Be careful,” she said. “It’s not safe close to the ledge.”

Before she could say anything, the roof door flew open.

A teenage girl and boy came stumbling through the door, and even without a breeze, she could smell the stale rancor of beer.

“I told you this was the best spot to see the eclipse,” she slurred her words, pointing to the sky as she walked.

“Looks like someone is already here,” he pointed at Laurie’s children.

“You up here to see the eclipse?” asked the girl, bending to the kids level.

“Just having a picnic with my kids,” said Laurie, moving to her blanket.

“I like picnics,” said the girl.

She and the boy sat down.

“Oatmeal,” he said, wrinkling up his nose.

“It’s for my children,” Laurie said, pulling the pot to herself.

“Really come on now, you can share,” the girl snatched the pot from Laurie, and stuck her hand in the steaming pot, pulling out a finger scoop of oatmeal.

“This is good,” she sucked her finger.

“There’s only enough for four,” said Laurie, gently taking the pot back.

“They are little kids,” said the boy, standing and towering over Laurie. “How much can they eat?” He reached for the pot.

Reluctantly, she gave it over.

The girl and boy walked to the roof edge and sat there scooping out the oatmeal with their fingers.

Then Laurie and the children stared up at the darkened sky. The eclipse was only for a few minutes.

She hugged her children to her. I can raise them better than that, she thought, thinking of the disrespectful wasted teenagers. I will do this.

As the sun came peeking back from behind the moon, Laurie turned to ask the boy for her pot.

Too late.

Her pot was on the roof, but neither teenager was and from the screams below, she figured they’d flown away.

“Let’s go get those popsicles,” said Laurie, leading her children back down the stairs and off the roof.

 

Almost the end of the challenge

I was wondering how everyone is doing with their stories? I will have Lynn read mine’s and get a cover made. I’m still a little iffy on spending a lot of money on a cover.

(Timmy I still want you to design a cover for “The Coven”.) I need to finish writing it. It changed and I’m a little off track. 🙁

Are people gearing up for National Novel Writing Month (NaNoWriMo) in November? I did the write a screenplay in a Month challenge before and honestly, I never looked at that screenplay again. Yep, crap.

So this is how bad I am at procrastinating. I have three, yes 3, works in progress. I should just put all three out at the same time, because they are all so varied. Honestly, I think that’s why they invented Prozac to stop procrastination in writers so we can focus. I get side tracked so easily.

I mean, this is usually me. When I get up in the morning and do the morning routine by the time I go back to make the bed, it’s almost time to go to work. Because I have to cook and eat breakfast, than play on FB, then exercise (not really) and shower and dress and then I’m like, oh shoot, I forgot to make the bed. Sorry rambling.

But flash fiction is what I’ve finished and the challenge was to publish it by Halloween. And I will hit that deadline. Yea, procrastinating me.

Continue to view the world through words.

Juin

 

 

Walking through my story

I’ve taken to really settling in my story environments. I am looking around as if I am the character so that I can give you more depth and connection to the stories I want to tell. By this I mean, I literally move through a pre-set amount of time in a day where I navigate as if I am the character I’m writing about to see what sensory details stand out to them.

Now mind you, I’m not following killers and thinking I need to emulate them in order to get a better understanding of how they think. But, for one character in “The Coven” (title may change now that it’s a television show on AMC with the same title, I haven’t decided), who doesn’t live in a brick and mortar house, I want to see how she would navigate in places or situations that are of no consequence to you or me. For example, what looks amazing to her when she is inside of a building? What may look out of place? What is scary or exciting? These are the things that I’m looking at. I’m also wondering how familial structures that differ from hers make her question if how she is being raised is good, bad or indifferent.

I’m trying not to over-think the story because then I stall and then it becomes an excuse not to write. When I’m reading books, I don’t usually care about the curtains, the wooden floor, the backyard, the smell of burnt cornbread, none of the sensory details because I just want to read and hear how the dialogue will move me through the story. But as a writer, I know that those same details that I skip over are what makes a story real for others. So that’s why I’m trying to take the time to get to those layers but not just for filler, but to make sure when I use them they have an intrinsic value to the story.

So try this if you’d like. Take ten to fifteen minutes and react and flow through a portion of your day in the eyes of your character and see something anew.

Write to see the world through words.

5 stories completed

I’m making serious headway with my flash fiction stories. I have five of them completed so far. I don’t like the ending on any of them…yet. I am glad I have the rest of the month to work them to the best state I can possible put them in, along with trying to work on the other five.

I want to put ten together. But I’m not punishing myself if I don’t.

How has your work been going? Are you working or just thinking about it and putting words on paper later?

I have noticed by taking this break to write these stories, I have a renewed outlook on where my story “The Coven” is going. There are a lot of scenes that need more detail and not non-essential details but real layers that enhance the experience for readers.

So as always, continue to see the world through words.

Story 1

Deep Sigh.

Shoulders slumped.

What the hell was I thinking – a mother who kills her kids and herself – as if there aren’t enough tragic real stories in the news. Flash fiction has been the hardest things I’ve ever tried to write. Get in, get out, but make an impact and make the story in 500 words or less, meaningful. That’s a huge task.

So I’ve started this story and the mom and children are on the roof having a make believe picnic with oatmeal and hot dogs. She has four children, she’s at the end of her rope. Did she intentionally think suicide and murder, I don’t know yet.  Will she go through with it, I don’t know yet. I know it’s hot, maybe the hottest day in months, and the heat in her apartment is what created the additional stress to her over burdened life and going up to the roof was a way to have fun. No air conditioner in her apartment, no fan or maybe a fan with only one blade working. I don’t know, I’m making this up as I type. The children are 5, 4, 3, 2 not too old that they know what is going on.

Okay, this is all pretty dismal so I want to switch it up. Oh, just now, I found a way to turn it around. I can’t tell you because that would ruin the surprise. But think about what you know about me and what I blog about. So it will be something supernatural. Can’t help it. It’s where my mind naturally goes. So I hope my brainstorming on the computer helps you to just track and go with your story. Don’t over think it.

Continue to see the world through words.

 

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